All weekend I was thinking of what to write about this week. Last week was a little rough for me—so many emotions that I continued to ask God, “okay, which should I use for the blog?” And honestly, I still haven’t figured it out. Over the weekend, God did renew my mind and my strength and I feel good going into this week. However, my thoughts haven’t quite been pieced together yet. So, as I was scrolling on FB through my memories, I saw a post from two years ago and it instantly sparked a thought so here we go.

Two years ago, on November 4, 2017, I had started a new position at my job. A couple of weeks before, I had been offered an assistant manager position and without thinking twice, I took it. I had expressed my interest rather casually maybe a month before that to my general manager, not really thinking or believing an offer would come so quickly. So when it did, I just knew it was God. He knew my current financial struggle and after just five months of being at the job, he had opened a door at the right time. Come to find out though, that wasn’t quite the door for me.

The post I made on FB read, “Headed to work, new position today. Holding on to His word and trusting that this is where He wants me to be!” And when I read that, I said to myself, ‘it wasn’t.’ It was not where God wanted me to be and when I wrote that, I was just hoping that His blessing would come from a decision I made for myself (I hope you caught that). That day, I knew that’s not where He wanted me, but I was too afraid to go back. I had accepted the position without even asking or seeking God to ensure His hand was on it. I had looked at what I could do for myself instead of trusting in what He could do for me. How did I know it wasn’t Him, you ask? Because it kept me from being where He was. A month prior, on October 4th, 2017, I walked into New Destiny for the first time. And I won’t go over that story again lol, you can go read my very first post “What Are You Afraid Of,” for that. Nevertheless, just after my second week of visiting the church and making the commitment in my heart that this was the place for me, then came the job offer. And as assistant manager, my scheduled literally required me to work Wednesday nights and Sunday mornings. The devil right?!! (kidding). I knew that before accepting the position too and somehow forgot right before I said yes.

What was I thinking? As I stated earlier, I wasn’t. I had took the offer with no thought whatsoever and had got myself into the most conflicting position possible. You may think I could have easily went back and said never mind before starting, and ya know, I wish I had the courage to do so then but I didn’t. The money wasn’t the only reason either. There was a guy I was trying to impress or prove myself to that I could handle such a position and I couldn’t dare turn it down now. And for the next two months, every Wednesday and Sunday I went to work, I literally felt it in my spirit that I was suppose to be somewhere else. I couldn’t get my mind off of New Destiny and the people I had met. The first Sunday I worked (which was my second day in the new position), I actually cried on my way there because I got a text from Erin(my YPW) that morning and it hit me deep that I couldn’t be there to accept my Holy Ghost certificate. It hurt so much I honestly pondered just saying forget this job and driving to church. But I had to suffer the consequences of my own decisions.

I tell this story to say, every open door isn’t always God. Sometimes, it’s a test of your faith. Sometimes, it’s a door opened by the enemy. Sometimes, it’s a door you forced open yourself. And if you walk into it, it may lead you in to a compromising situation. Accepting that position stunted my growth in God because it kept me from being where I needed to be. My thirst and hunger for God was so big at that time and I felt at war with my spirit. I liked my job I did, don’t get me wrong. And I was eager to take on the challenge—the timing just was not right. How quick we are though, to jump at the first opportunity that comes our way in a time of need. My pay was increased and I found comfort, but shortly after, expenses increased too and it was square one all over again. The position came with me switching locations and after a month, I got moved back to where I started. I thought, ‘wow this wasn’t even worth it.’ I wanted to just go back to my old position but knew it was too late. My spot was already filled and even if it wasn’t, the possibility for another shot at being a manager was slim to none so I held on to it, trusting that it would eventually work for me . . it didn’t.

Two months later, I quit. I had never quit a job in my life (granted I’ve only had four including my current one) but the day I did, I felt an overwhelming peace. At that point, I didn’t care anymore. The money didn’t matter; the position or title, the cool manager polos and sweaters, what the guy thought of me—none of that mattered more than my peace and my salvation. So my encouragement for you this week, is to choose carefully what doors you walk in to because every one won’t be for you. Every opportunity doesn’t have your name it. The circumstances you get yourself into will often require you to get yourself out. Carefully consider what you may be losing or sacrificing before you make a decision. Could it be your peace? Your freedom? Your joy and happiness? Your integrity . . . your salvation? All these things that the world can’t give and the world can’t take away. The enemy loves to make things appear good on the outside though, and sometimes he will even use the Word of God to tempt you like he did Jesus on the mountain. But you must know better and do better. Ask God first; He wouldn’t give you something that would cause you to compromise your faith or your values. He knows what you need and has it prepared just for you. Set your standards and let God’s favor rest upon you. Wait on Him, and in just the right time, He will lift you up in honor.

Until next time . .

“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” - Proverbs‬ ‭3:5-6‬ ‭(KJV‬‬)

“Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above; it comes down from the Father of lights [the Creator and Sustainer of the heavens], in whom there is no variation [no rising or setting] or shadow cast by His turning [for He is perfect and never changes].” - James 1:17‬ ‭(AMP‬‬)

“Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God [set aside self-righteous pride], so that He may exalt you [to a place of honor in His service] at the appropriate time,” - 1 Peter‬ ‭5:6‬ ‭(AMP‬)

“Unless the LORD builds the house, They labor in vain who build it; Unless the LORD guards the city, The watchman keeps awake in vain.” - ‭‭Psalm ‭127:1‬ (‭AMP‬)